Sadly, Resignation

"I'm not a leader /
I'm not a left-wing rhetoric-mobilizing force of one.
But there was a time way back many years ago in college
Don't laugh, but I thought I was a radical...

I am sad to say that I am no longer a liberal and no longer a feminist. At the same time I am relieved. There will be no more arguments in my head. No more echoing of my grandmother's voice, quoting Winston Churchill: "If you're young and you're not liberal, you don't have a heart. If you're old and you're not conservative, you don't have a brain."

I am not conservative either. I am just sadly resigned. Feminism is something to get excited about in college. It is great fun. It does not stop rape, femicide, domestic violence.

There is still war, poverty, racism, and other injustice and always will be despite what liberals and radicals argue about. That doesn't mean one shouldn't care about these things. There just isn't a point. It makes me sad, but less exhaused too.

Disappointed.

If only it weren't true, but it is.

The world is not kind.

I am a 31-year-old single woman without much income. I live far away from my family. I am depressed and tired.

Politics sell books, magazines, bumper stickers, T-shirts. They don't change anything.

Congratulations, Republican relatives.

You win.

I give up.

Martyr

Inspired by my friend C's autobiographical erotic poetry about power exchange:

I'll write a poem "Martyr" about my grandmother's next-door neighbor, who stayed with her abusive husband, raised 2 sons. How my mother objected to her not being allowed to go to church, not to the abuse.

With Apologies

The writing in this blog has been not up to what I am capable of.